[benellis58]

Fortunately, all ended well, as we made 3D for a shared top of (a mere) 65.79 % on the board (yes, it was "shared" by MANY players)...but that was QUITE a 3D call...RED AGAINST WHITE (!!!)...by the GIBBO robot in the North with his flattish 4-3-4-2 (!) TWO(!)-count (!), with both his points in jacks...in a GIBBO system where his partner South could easily have had only a THREE-card diamond suit.

One of the COUNTLESS weaknesses of these GIBBO losers is that they never give any thought whatsoever to the vulnerability.

https://www.bridgeba...CHK%7Cmc%7C9%7C

[benellis58]

Why is West doubling 5D? Why is the GIB definition of West's double so typically useless? Why does East PULL the double to 5H?

The only one of those three questions that I can answer is the final one: East pulls the double because he knows that his "partner" West, being a GIBBO robot, is a raving lunatic. Note that East's PULL of the double does NOT correspond to the hand he SHOULD have according to the GIB definition of 5H.


https://www.bridgeba...S7%7Cpc%7CCJ%7C

[benellis58]

West leads a heart, won by dummy's ace, as declarer South pitches a club.

At trick two, declarer calls for dummy's club 6. "Defender" East, with J8 doubleton, plays the jack. WHY? This second hand HIGH stupidity was a hallmark of the GIB robots, who - as hard as this may be to believe - were even WORSE than the wretched GIBBO robots, thanks to some small improvements made by Lorserker a short while ago.

"Defender" West wins his club ace and of COURSE immediately plays another CLUB. WHY? Well, this question I can answer: He plays another CLUB because...these truly WITLESS and totally incompetent GIBBO fleabrains LOVE to return the suit DECLARER just played...undoubtedly because they ARE fleabrains. BTW, I sincerely apologize to any and all FLEAS that I might have insulted by that comparison!

https://www.bridgeba...DA%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

Here's a simple, straightforward equation:

GIBBO robots = garbage.

[benellis58]

50 % 0n this board. An example of one of the many bad things about the GIBBO system.

https://www.bridgeba...DJ%7Cpc%7CSQ%7C

[benellis58]

It worked out fairly well, but I'm surprised that North passed in passout seat with his 5-5 in the majors.

https://www.bridgeba...CS5%7Cmc%7C6%7C

[benellis58]

East foolishly decides to pitch diamonds.

https://www.bridgeba...C8%7Cpc%7CS8%7C

[benellis58]

THREE hearts by North? Doesn't the WORLD open FOUR with that? Meanwhile, let's be very polite to EW and simply and quietly observe that they will probably not win awards for their "defence" on the hand. The GIB definitions will similarly FAIL to win praise.

https://www.bridgeba...SJ%7Cpc%7CC8%7C

[benellis58]

A...HEART (!) lead on this auction?!

A... complete (!) DUCK (!) of the heart lead at trick one?!

https://www.bridgeba...SJ%7Cpc%7CS8%7C

[benellis58]

I have written many very insulting things about the GIB definitions, the GIB/GIBBO system, and the GIB/GIBBO robots.

I must apologize.

Why? Because despite all my efforts, I have probably failed to convey how utterly pathetic and nauseating they are. I'm afraid my vocabulary is not extensive enough to adequately describe the full, sickening wretchedness of the pathetic definitions, the unworkable and antiquated joke of a system, and the world-class incompetence of the robots.

Worst of the worst? Certainly. Lowest of the low? Most definitely. Garbage that should long ago have been incinerated? Indubitably.

But those words don't even come close to adequately describing how truly contemptible and loathsome the GIBBO robots are, so, again I apologize.

[benellis58]

At trick three, the GIBBO loser in the West wins his heart ace. At trick four, he has an obvious club shift, but being a GIBBO robot, and therefore being less intelligent than a doorknob, he follows his lifelong sick, twisted, illogical, loser's philosophy of immediately returning the suit DECLARER just played. Thus, the fleabrain returns a heart. And of COURSE he ridiculously returns the heart jack.

Now, even if he had correctly returned a club, I still would have taken 11 tricks, but that doesn't excuse the jerk's typically lazy and stupid play.

It was gratifying to see that the two GIBBO numbskulls sitting East-West added yet another complete zero to their massive collection of failures. The only surprising thing is that these repulsive imbeciles don't get a zero on every board they play.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2rsk7jhe

[benellis58]

53.6 % on this board for "only" going one down in 4H.

Another fine example of why the GIBBO bidding system stinks like salami that's been sitting in Florida sunlight for seven months and fourteen days:

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/482a39kc

[benellis58]

East opens one CLUB, so of course West leads a...DIAMOND. He scores 7.1 & on the board. His opponents score 92.9 %.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/yckk2smy

[benellis58]

South opens one HEART and later jumps to 2NT over North's 1S response. North raises to 3NT and all pass.

Thus, West is on lead against 3NT with 97652, 7, 752, K1095.

He thinks it's a positively BRILLIANT idea to lead his STIFF (!) 7...of HEARTS...INTO the declarer who OPENED one heart.

Spoiler alert: It was not brilliant. It was also not SANE! Declarer romped home with TWELVE tricks. North-South scored 92.9 % on the board. East- West scored a miserable but TOTALLY well-deserved 7.1 %.

I will begin my next sentence by quoting the late great Janes Brown in the first three underlined words, and then ad-libbing the remainder of the sentence with my own.

"Please, please, please"...INCINERATE these useless, repugnant GIBBO robots and replace them with DECENT ones!

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/443mryfy

[benellis58]

To any bridge player, the diamond situation is obvious at trick one. The "defender" sitting East, however, is not a bridge player (without quotation marks), he is a "bridge player" WITH "quotation marks - meaning in name ONLY, because like ALL GIBBO robots, he hasn't got a CLUE about how to play bridge.

He wins his diamond ace at trick one and switches to his spade queen. ASTONISHINGLY, two entire tricks have been played and he STILL hasn't shown the world how totally incompetent he is!

But such a MIRACLE can't go on forever, so at trick three the jackass confirms his status as one of the all-time worst "bridge players" in history when, braindead dweeb that he is, he goes back to diamonds. Why doesn't this incompetent loser take a job in a circus - where CLOWNS are appreciated?

https://www.bridgeba...CD8%7Cmc%7C9%7C

[benellis58]

Another hand from OMARHEUM, who wrote "Only 41%, though I thought I had done ok making 4S. 3NT did better at most tables."

First I'll comment on the bidding. Looking only at South's hand, the two likely calls over pard's 3C are 3S and 3NT. I don't think I would criticize either, and whichever works out better on this or any other random hand will depend to a large extent on the complete layout of said hand, because while bridge is definitely a game of skill, it is at the same time a game VERY much affected by the random LUCK of whatever a random layout turns out to be.

I think OMAR's 3S call was fine, and I suspect that it was probably a "better" choice than 3NT in general. 3S is more flexible, theoretically safer, and CAN involve partner North, who might even (albeit rarely) bid 3NT himself over 3S. OR he might pass, OR - as he did here - raise to 4S.

Unfortunately for OMAR, on THIS hand with THIS random layout, you would rather be in 3NT. 4S has no legitimate play, but thanks to the 4-4 diamond split, 3NT is cold. Furthermore, without a diamond lead, NS have 10 top tricks in no trump...and West probably won't lead a diamond. He will presumably make the normal heart lead, and South will trot home with an overtrick in 3NT.

So, I think OMAR was unlucky to have this particular layout on this random hand.

Now, let's get to the MISSION STATEMENT of this thread that Diana so wisely created and named, and let's do some GIBBO robot bashing.

West produced a sadly typical GIBBO "defence" - in other words, a truly abysmal one. After winning the THIRD defensive trick with his spade (trump) queen, it was 100 % obvious to play a DIAMOND. The South declarer had obviously been playing diamonds in the hope of setting up a third-round ruff in dummy, and East (to his credit AND to my amazement, considering that he too is a contemptible GIBBO robot) had obviously played spades (trump) in the hope of preventing that hoped-for third-round diamond ruff.

Furthermore, East was MARKED for the diamond ace, because if South had had it, he would have CASHED it on the second round of diamonds and then RUFFED his third (losing) diamond with dummy's lone remaining trump - as that had been his objective right from the start.

Moreover, South was MARKED with the high king of hearts, because if EAST had held it, surely he would have CASHED it before playing the second round of spades.

So, as usual, the GIBBO robot sitting West confirmed (for what - the 10 trillionth time, perhaps?) that he is one of the worst "defenders" the world of bridge has ever been TAINTED by! Note that if he wasn't such a complete M.O.R.O.N., he would have not just defeated 4S, but he would have defeated it TWO tricks: East- West already have three. An OBVIOUS diamond to East's OBVIOUS ace makes it four, and now East plays a CLUB, which West RUFFS with his last trump, to make it FIVE.

But because West is the bridge community's lowest form of slime, a repulsive and ignorant GIBBO robot, instead of beating 4S two tricks, he allowed it to make. GIBBO robots: the lowest of the low, the worst of the worst - always, ever, forever.

https://www.bridgeba...C3%7Cmc%7C10%7C

[benellis58]

This board shows how astoundingly incompetent the hopeless GIBBO robots are. Yes, I realize that this does not make this board special, as just about EVERY board shows what useless, pathetic garbage the GIBBO robots are.

But this board is worth reporting - in fact, SO worth reporting that I will discuss it in THREE consecutive posts! This post (1657) will document what happened at my table, and the following two posts (1658 and 1659) will show what happened with the same board but different results at two other tables.

So, to begin with, the story from my table:

Despite my 15 HCP, I passed pard's invitational 3C, because I suspected (correctly, as it turned out) that we had no game. First, pard (being a GIBBO robot!) often delivers less than what he should have (although in fairness, his 3C call here was reasonable). Second, my 15 HCP didn't look like they would really be worth 15, since the short jacks in both majors were probably valueless. Third, it was matchpoints, not IMPs. Fourth, pard's initial one SPADE response (opposite my stiff jack) was a cautionary signal, since any values he had there (apart from a potential ace) might prove to be useless. Finally, I bid much more conservatively on BBO than in "real" F2F bridge because (rightly or wrongly) my impression is that layouts tend to be more unfavourable on BBO than in "real" F2F hands.

The GIBBO robot in the West made one of his favourite (and usually ineffective) leads: top of a doubleton, in this case the 10 of diamonds from 102. This turned out to be as ineffective as usual. ALL my diamonds were IMMEDIATELY winners. They would have been such even without the lead, thanks to the very favourable layout with the suit 2-2 and the queen onside, but I wouldn't have KNOWN that IMMEDIATELY without the lead.

More importantly, though, I was on lead at trick two, so - having ESCAPED a heart lead, I was able to quickly pitch one of my two TOP heart losers on pard's second high spade, and then knock out the trump (club) ace.

A DECENT West, upon winning his trump ace at trick four, would find the now OBVIOUS play of a heart, holding me to "only" 11 tricks, as I would lose the trump ace (which he had just scored) and the OBVIOUS heart ace. I had been BORN with three TOP losers (two hearts and a club), so making eleven tricks should be good. But...I made an "impossible" TWELVE (!) tricks, because THIS West was NOT "a DECENT West" - he was a typically braindead GIBBO robot, which he proved...beyond even a SHADOW of a doubt...by STUPIDLY playing a second diamond! There's "stupid", and then there's "STUPID", and trust me: GIBBO robots (the pond scum of the bridge world) are always "STUPID". I won his foolish diamond play, and claimed, pulling the remaining enemy trumps and pitching my SECOND (TOP!) heart loser on dummy's fifth diamond.

I expected not a top, but a GOOD score. We can't make 5C, as the opponents have three TOP tricks (two hearts and a club) and we can't make 3NT, as they have SIX...TOP winners (five hearts and a club) and they BOTH have a natural heart lead against 3NT (all the more so in view of North's 1S bid).

Not only did we avoid the "impossible" games, but with plus 170 for 3C with THREE (!) overtricks, we rated to outscore (or at least tie) any others who stopped in a club partial...and also any who stopped in a NT partial, since there was NO way they would take TEN tricks in a NT partial and score plus 180.

When I saw the actual score on the board, I was, shall we say, a tad disappointed. We obtained a mere 57.69 %. This is why:

We beat five pairs:

A: One played in a bizarre 5 hearts (!), not surprisingly going down SIX (!) in their 2-2 (!) "fit". Perhaps a misclick by the human?
B: One played in three diamonds, making ten tricks. A heart was led (probably because West was steered off his beloved doubleton lead because his doubleton here was now TRUMP), so EW took two top hearts plus the club ace.
C: One played, as we did, in 3C, but made "only" the NORMAL ten tricks that SHOULD have been a par result. EW defended differently, but not any better, so the human declarer SHOULD have taken 12 tricks but he badly misplayed the hand. (Sorry, anonymous human. I didn't say it to bash you, but just to give an accurate account of what happened.)
D: Two others also played in 3C, making ELEVEN tricks, one MORE than par (the NORMAL ten) but one less than our TWELVE. These two declarers received the same joke of a "defence" that we did, but (like the human above who took TEN tricks in 3C) also badly misplayed the hand. (Sorry to you two anonymous human declarers also, but it's that "accuracy" thing again.)

We tied five pairs. Four of them declared 3C, as we did, and made the "impossible" 12 tricks, as we did. The fifth pair declared FOUR clubs, and also made the "impossible" 12 tricks.

Okay, all fairly understandable so far. BUT... we actually LOST (!) to three NS pairs:

A: One of them bid the "unmakeable" 3NT and...MADE (!)...wait for it...TWELVE (!!!!!) tricks to score an OBVIOUS 100 % on the board.
B: Two of them bid the "unmakeable" 5C and MADE it with an OVERTRICK, taking an "impossible" TWELVE tricks.

In the next post (1658) I will present what happened when 5C was bid, and in the one after that (1659) I will present what happened when 3NT was bid. Meanwhile, here's the link to the board at my table:

https://www.bridgeba...C8%7Cmc%7C12%7C

[benellis58]

Okay, as promised, this is the same hand as in post #1657 immediately above, but from a different table with a different result.

Here the human South obviously operated, opening 1D rather than the normal 1C. He ended up in an "impossible" 5C, off three TOP losers (two hearts and a club), but he made it (!)...with an overtrick (!), as he took TWELVE tricks.

How did that happen? HERE'S how: He received EXACTLY the same HORRENDOUS "defence" that WE did in OUR three club contract: The lead of the diamond ten, followed by a SECOND diamond (!), the two, after West won his club ace.

Now, even at OUR table, this "defence" was WRETCHED, but here - against FIVE clubs - it was even WORSE...and FAR worse! Why? Well, for one thing it was against a FIVE-level contract and not a "mere" THREE-level one, but FAR more importantly, at THIS table, the human South had OPENED ONE DIAMOND (!), and...as if THAT wasn't ALREADY enough (!), North had JUMPED TO THREE (!) DIAMONDS (!) over South's 2C rebid!

And yet, West STILL thought that his 10 of diamonds from 102 was the absolutely BEST lead he could make!

Even MORE laughably, after SEEING dummy, and after SEEING the play to the first FOUR tricks, West...at trick FIVE, played his remaining 2 of diamonds!

This is astounding: I began playing with and against the GIB robots in the summer of 2017, a full 9 years ago. I play almost every day. I have played thousands and thousands of boards with and against GIB/GIBBO robots. EVERY single ONE of those days I have witnessed INCREDIBLE examples of MASSIVE stupidity from all three robots at the table. I KNOW that they are the worst "bridge players" I have ever, EVER encountered in my many DECADES of playing. I have known that since I first played robot games in 2017, yet EVERY SINGLE DAY they "treat" me to new and creative examples of how stunningly bad they are. Every single day! Not only that, but they often do something so AMAZINGLY ridiculous that I think, "Okay, that's it. They will ALWAYS be bad, but they will NEVER be able to do something even WORSE than what they just did"...and then the next day, I realize that my NAIVE statement was incorrect, because they DO do something EVEN worse! Virtually every day, they come up with NEW ways to be even MORE worthless than they were the day before. It is absolutely mind-boggling what TOTAL pieces of GARBAGE the GIBBO robots are!

https://www.bridgeba...C7%7Cpc%7CHK%7C

[benellis58]

Okay, as promised, here's the third and last post in our trilogy (1657, 1658, and now 1659). This is that same board, but here it was played in 3NT, which had SIX (!!!) TOP (!!!) losers (five hearts and the ace of clubs) and should have therefore easily been down two...except that the "defenders" were two typically braindead pieces of trash known as GIBBO robots, so not only did 3NT make, but it made with...THREE OVERTRICKS!

The "defenders" should have held declarer to SEVEN tricks, but they allowed him to make...TWELVE! In fact, I expressed that poorly, because they didn't really "allow" him to make 12 - they PRESENTED HIM WITH 12...ON A PLATTER (probably including some shrimp, caviar, and champagne to accompany it)!

The human South, for whatever reason (just plain operating, I guess) made a bizarre rebid of 2NT over North's 1S, and North innocently and normally raised to 3NT.

West, to his credit, found the NORMAL (so let's not give him TOO much "credit")...and KILLING lead of a heart. Bravo, Mr. West.

East, a GIBBO robot (as I'm SURE you would guess from his play!), decided to insert his 10 from A1042, so declarer South, who had been born with J8 DOUBLETON facing partner/dummy North's Q8 DOUBLETON, ...WON the first trick with his jack.

Well, great start for him obviously, but sadly his contract STILL has no play. The BEST he can LEGITIMATELY do at this point is cash out for down one, by taking (only) eight total tricks: The heart jack that he was just GIFTED, the AK of spades, and five diamonds (thanks to the friendly layout with diamonds 2-2 and the queen onside). Perhaps down one won't be great, but it's better than the down two that he was originally doomed to.

But WAIT, because declarer suddenly realizes something! He might be able to STEAL his contract, because...

If he tries to do BETTER than down one by knocking out the club ace to set up more winners for himself, the opponents can win the club ace and BELATEDLY take their heart tricks...but "ONLY" four of the five that they were BORN with and SHOULD have taken on the fly. So EVEN if they do that, he's still "only" going down one! "Might as well TRY it," he says to himself. "If I cash out, I'm DEFINITELY going down one, but if I play clubs, even IF they defend properly the rest of the way, I'm STILL going down 'only' one, so I have NOTHING to lose by playing clubs, and PLENTY to gain if they're STUPID enough not to take their remaining hearts! And since they're the garbage known as GIBBO robots, I know that they are ASTOUNDINGLY stupid".

So, at trick two, our human hero leads a club to dummy's jack, and...it WINS, as West ducks. West COULD have hopped ace and cashed FOUR hearts for down one, but he...DUCKED. NOW South CAN cash out and actually MAKE his "impossible" 3NT contract, because he already has TWO tricks in the bag (a heart that EAST could have WON, and a club that WEST could have WON), plus the AK of spades, plus FIVE diamonds. That adds up to NINE tricks! He can now cash out and MAKE his "impossible" 3NT, which should give him a GREAT SCORE!

But our human hero is VERY greedy and follows the philosophy espoused by Gordon Gekko (played by Michael Douglas, who won a Best Actor Academy Award for his performance) in the 1988 classic movie "Wall Street". The philosophy? "Greed is good". The movie was referring to the financial world, but our human hero reasonably feels that greed is also good in matchpoint bridge games, so...he DOESN'T cash out. He plays a SECOND club, dummy's now stiff 10, and slides it. It...WINS, as West ducks (!) for a SECOND time! NOW our human hero can cash out for TEN (!) tricks (the one heart and two clubs that he already has in the bag, even though ALL THREE of those tricks COULD have been won by the EW "defenders"; plus the AK of spades and five diamonds). TEN tricks! 3NT with an OVERTRICK (!) on a hand where EW should have beaten him two tricks ON THE FLY!

But our stalwart human hero AGAIN thinks of Gordon Gekko. "Greed is GOOD, " he thinks, and "GIBBO robots are SO bad!". It's an easy decision for him. He plays a diamond to his...KING (NOT his ace, NOT his jack, but his KING, which would be a HUGE clue to ANY competent defender!). He then plays a third club (!), the king. West, down to a stiff ace, can't duck, so -probably with great sadness - he perforce wins his ace.

Did South go to the well once too often? Has he turned a GREAT score (plus 430 for 3NT plus an overtrick, in a contract that should have been down two off the top!) into a BAD score, through the deadly sin of greed? Did Gordon Gekko lead him astray? Will he never again watch a Michael Douglas movie?

No, all is FINE in South's world, because the GIBBO robot wins his club ace and plays back his...2...of DIAMONDS! (Yes, he was kind enough to follow to the previous diamond trick with his TEN - you know, just in case DECLARER needed any MORE help). Declarer, of course, takes ALL the remaining tricks...and that is how he made THREE overtricks in his 3NT contract that began with SIX TOP LOSERS!

Please remind me AGAIN, o ye apologists for and defenders of the GIBBO robots - yes, by ALL means, please remind me AGAIN of what you have so often said: namely that you are CONVINCED that the GIBBO robots play "better than most humans".

I respectfully disagree.

https://www.bridgeba...S8%7Cpc%7CHA%7C

[benellis58]

The fact that I scored 91.67 % for making 4S is no justification whatsoever for North's LEAP (!) to FOUR (!) spades in the passout seat over East's THREE clubs!

Given that he had already previously transferred to spades via 2H, thereby promising at least five spades, he now had:

The fewest spades he could possibly have, with "only" five; and the flattest hand he could possibly have (given the presence of a five-card suit) at 5-3-2-3.

Furthermore, his (mere) five spades are not THE worst they could possibly be, but his miserable suit "quality" of 87632 is very close to the worst!

In addition: He has a mere SEVEN (!) HCP. If West had passed South's 2S rather than doubling it for takeout, North would SURELY have also...PASSED, since his hand was not EVEN worth inviting with 2NT! Just consider THAT! He would have passed out 2S in an uninterrupted auction, but he now LEAPS to FOUR spades after the opponents have...shown values! On top of that, since it was WEST who made the takeout double, HIS values will be BEHIND South's...AND if enemy spades don't split (which they probably WON'T, given West's TAKEOUT double) the enemy length in spades will be BEHIND the NS length in spades!

There is NOTHING to be said FOR his...JUMP (!!!) to FOUR (!) spades, and PLENTY to be said against it! For all HE knows, his "partner" South could conceivably have a mere DOUBLETON spade, and EAST could potentially have five or even six!

If North wants to compete, SURELY he has better options than JUMPING to FOUR spades!

Yet another "creative" piece of lunacy from the always execrable GIBBO robots!

https://www.bridgeba...H7%7Cmc%7C10%7C