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Bridge Quotes If Famous Persons Had Played Bridge.

#61 User is offline   Winstonm 

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Posted 2005-October-04, 23:45

As God it is my witness, I'll never go set again!

Scarlett O'Hara
"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."
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#62 User is offline   Winstonm 

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Posted 2005-October-04, 23:47

Sucker: "Is this a game of chance?"

Fields: "Not the way I play it, no...."

W.C. Fields
"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."
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#63 User is offline   1eyedjack 

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Posted 2005-October-09, 17:09

One of my favourate non-bridge quotes that might be applied to bridge is from Enter The Dragon, 1973, when Bruce Lee quoth
"Don' theeenk. Feeeel!"

There are several quotes from Sun Tzu's "The Art of War" that not surprisingly translate almost literally to the Bridge sphere. Here is a selection:

The Art is a flexible System

Much computation brings triumph.
Little computation brings defeat.
How much more so with no computation at all!

Those who have made no errors
have arranged for certain triumph:
A triumph over those who are already defeated.

Directing is like a tautly drawn crossbow

Analysis gives rise to balancing.
Balance gives rise to triumph ...
Such is Positioning.

Those skilled in conflict
Who Direct through others,
Seem to travel like a rounded boulder
Down a thousand-meter mountain.
Such is Directing.

When either we or others must seize the advantage,
The Situation is Competitive.

If we know the opponent is able to confront
And know our team is able to confront,
But do not know Situational Positioning,
We are unable to challenge
Because we are but halfway to triumph.

(OK that last one would have been better if for "Situational Positioning" you read "Positional Situations")
Psych (pron. saik): A gross and deliberate misstatement of honour strength and/or suit length. Expressly permitted under Law 73E but forbidden contrary to that law by Acol club tourneys.

Psyche (pron. sahy-kee): The human soul, spirit or mind (derived, personification thereof, beloved of Eros, Greek myth).
Masterminding (pron. mPosted ImagesPosted ImagetPosted Imager-mPosted ImagendPosted Imageing) tr. v. - Any bid made by bridge player with which partner disagrees.

"Gentlemen, when the barrage lifts." 9th battalion, King's own Yorkshire light infantry,
2000 years earlier: "morituri te salutant"

"I will be with you, whatever". Blair to Bush, precursor to invasion of Iraq
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#64 User is offline   Chamaco 

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Posted 2005-October-10, 05:29

"You talking to me ?!?!?" Robert De Niro (Taxi Driver),

being asked the meaning of his partner's bid.
"Bridge is like dance: technique's important but what really matters is not to step on partner's feet !"
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#65 User is offline   Double ! 

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Posted 2005-October-10, 10:32

"How many wins must one man(woman) have before we call him(her) an expert?
The answer, my friend, is Blowin' in the Wind. The answer is Blowin' in the Wind"
"That's my story, and I'm sticking to it!"
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#66 User is offline   1eyedjack 

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Posted 2005-October-12, 02:05

"FOCUS, Daniel-san!"

-Mr Miyagi, on tabling dummy
Psych (pron. saik): A gross and deliberate misstatement of honour strength and/or suit length. Expressly permitted under Law 73E but forbidden contrary to that law by Acol club tourneys.

Psyche (pron. sahy-kee): The human soul, spirit or mind (derived, personification thereof, beloved of Eros, Greek myth).
Masterminding (pron. mPosted ImagesPosted ImagetPosted Imager-mPosted ImagendPosted Imageing) tr. v. - Any bid made by bridge player with which partner disagrees.

"Gentlemen, when the barrage lifts." 9th battalion, King's own Yorkshire light infantry,
2000 years earlier: "morituri te salutant"

"I will be with you, whatever". Blair to Bush, precursor to invasion of Iraq
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#67 User is offline   Winstonm 

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Posted 2005-October-12, 23:51

"You'll regret it. Oh, maybe not today....but soon, and for the rest of your life."

Humphrey Bogart on learning and playing Relay Precision
"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."
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#68 User is offline   han 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 10:29

The following are all Einstein's:


Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.

Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.

Bridge is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one's living at it.

Do not worry about your difficulties in Bridge. I can assure you mine are still greater.

No, this trick won't work...How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of HCP's and losers so important a phenomenon as hand evaluation.

A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties; no director is necessary. Man would indeeded be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear of punishment.

Please note: I am interested in boring, bog standard, 2/1.

- hrothgar
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#69 User is offline   han 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 10:41

Some recent quotes from George W Bush:


I think that steroids ought to be banned from bridge.

We do know that he has no sense of civility about who he squeezes.


(first one originally about baseball, second originally about Osama Bin Laden)


And we are fighting our opponents, and we will continue to fight our opponents, and we will not stop until we defeat our opponents.


Will stop here because I don't want to offend anyone. (Well, perhaps I do, but this is a bridge forum.)
Please note: I am interested in boring, bog standard, 2/1.

- hrothgar
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#70 User is offline   JSilver 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 13:06

I sorted, I counted, I bid slam--Caesar
"Violence is the last resort of the incompetent." --Isaac Asimov
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#71 User is offline   JSilver 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 13:24

The most beautiful bridge in the world…. so pure, so resolute, so regular that here, finally, bidding architecture seems to laugh.--Le Corbusier, kibitzing Meckstroth-Rodwell
"Violence is the last resort of the incompetent." --Isaac Asimov
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#72 User is offline   JSilver 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 13:34

Is an intelligent bidder likely to be much more than a large-scale manufacturer of misunderstanding?--Phillip Roth
"Violence is the last resort of the incompetent." --Isaac Asimov
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#73 User is offline   JSilver 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 13:35

Psyching is the last resort of the incompetent.--Isaac Asimov
"Violence is the last resort of the incompetent." --Isaac Asimov
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#74 User is offline   Rain 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 13:38

London Bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down
London Bridge is falling down, my fair lady-- maybe mother goose
"More and more these days I find myself pondering how to reconcile my net income with my gross habits."

John Nelson.
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#75 User is offline   Al_U_Card 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 13:49

I made him an invitation, he couldn't refuse....the GF (at least initially....lol)
The Grand Design, reflected in the face of Chaos...it's a fluke!
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#76 User is offline   JSilver 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 16:54

Different bids for different kids.--Sly Stone
"Violence is the last resort of the incompetent." --Isaac Asimov
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#77 User is offline   cherdano 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 17:01

There is no such thing as a free finesse.
The easiest way to count losers is to line up the people who talk about loser count, and count them. -Kieran Dyke
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#78 User is offline   1eyedjack 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 17:17

"Next time, we get our retaliation in first"

-Judge Dredd, cca 1980, on discovering the wisdom of preemption
Psych (pron. saik): A gross and deliberate misstatement of honour strength and/or suit length. Expressly permitted under Law 73E but forbidden contrary to that law by Acol club tourneys.

Psyche (pron. sahy-kee): The human soul, spirit or mind (derived, personification thereof, beloved of Eros, Greek myth).
Masterminding (pron. mPosted ImagesPosted ImagetPosted Imager-mPosted ImagendPosted Imageing) tr. v. - Any bid made by bridge player with which partner disagrees.

"Gentlemen, when the barrage lifts." 9th battalion, King's own Yorkshire light infantry,
2000 years earlier: "morituri te salutant"

"I will be with you, whatever". Blair to Bush, precursor to invasion of Iraq
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#79 User is offline   Winstonm 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 23:47

"Shhh. Be vewy, vewy quiet.....I'm pwaying Wabbits!"

Elmer Fudd
"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."
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#80 User is offline   Winstonm 

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Posted 2005-October-13, 23:53

"The players on this team have some odd nicknames."

"Who's sitting North?"

"That's right."

"What's right?"

"No, What is South."

"What?"

"Right."

"But who's North."

"I told you. Who."

"That's what I'm asking you! Who is North?!"

"Exactly"

Bud Abbot and Lou Costello
"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."
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