[benellis58]

Why it pays to operate against the perpetually braindead GIBBO robots, chapter 14,027:

https://www.bridgeba...SQ%7Cpc%7CC6%7C

[benellis58]

Mr. and Mrs. Herbert Cartwright At Home One Evening

Mrs. C.: "Honey, did you forget to take out the garbage today?

Mr. C.: "No, dear. I took it out like I do every day. Why do you ask?"

Mrs. C.: "I'm sorry, darling. You know I trust you to do your chores. It's just that for exactly the last hour I feel as if I have been smelling garbage in here."

Mr. C. "Well, never mind that, sweetheart. I'd like you to meet two good friends of mine. Their names are Frick and Frack. They are those GIBBO robots I told you about."

Mrs. C.: "I'm pleased to meet you, Mr. Frick. Would you like some coffee, Mr. Frack? By the way, how long ago did you gentlemen arrive at our house?"

Frick: "Exactly one hour ago, Mrs. Cartwright."

Mrs. C. : "Exactly one hour ago?! That's what I thought! Herbert, I want to see you privately in the kitchen...right NOW!"

[benellis58]

Good evening, ladies and gentleman. My name is Johnny Halfwit. I am a proud GIBBO robot, and in tonight's demonstration I will show you an EXCELLENT lead that one of my GIBBO brothers recently made.

Many human players would have led a DIAMOND from their FIVE-card suit, but I'm pleased to say that my fellow robot was wise enough to lead a HEART from his THREE-card suit, in the hope of establishing one or more of his three hearts as winners. REMARKABLY, however, neither his three, nor his four, nor EVEN (!) his FIVE (!!) took a trick! Obviously, this was a freak hand!

My GIBBO colleague scored 7.1 % on the board, while his NS opponents ( a HUMAN, and another GIBBO brother of mine, who was unlucky enough to be saddled with a HUMAN partner - because we ALL know that "we play MUCH better than most humans"!) scored 92.9 %. A travesty! Why was my brother's EXCELLENT lead not rewarded with a top? No justice, no justice at ALL!

This is Johnny Halfwit signing off. Please tune in again tomorrow for FURTHER proof of how great we robots play! And you can trust ME, because I come from a LONG line of Halfwits, ALL of whom were either GIB or GIBBO robots!

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/3x5abc5j

[benellis58]

The GIBBO "defenders" - Ding in the West and Bat in the East BOTH pitch down to only two clubs, so I score THREE club tricks, with NO club losers.

Thank you for your USUAL generosity, Dingbats!

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/ykahm23b

[benellis58]

The GIBBO partnership of Simon Simpleton in the West and Donald J. Dumbo in the East does not exactly shine, as BOTH these GIBBO dimwits pitch hearts at trick 11. They're both as stupid as someone who would stare into an eclipse with the naked eye. In fact, maybe one of them did?

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/23amujt7

[benellis58]

West thinks 3S is a good bid. I don't.

I do, however, think that it proves he's a....GIBBO robot (a "bridge player" with less intelligence than a slice of processed cheese).

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/mrxf6ucy

[benellis58]

New day, same old subject. The subject, of course, is garbage, and the garbage, of course, is GIBBO: the system, the definitions, the robots - ALL garbage.

The garbage is basically always present, although it's not always obvious unless you look carefully at everything in the hand. Why? Because although the GLARING errors of the contemptible robots are immediately apparent, many of their "subtle" errors (wrong card, poor decision, etc.) escape notice. Also, if you don't read every GIB definition, you will not notice how pathetic so many of them are. However, if you study the hands thoroughly, virtually every one involving GIBBO has at least one example of how disgustingly bad it is.

On this board, NS reached a normal spot and scored 82.1 %. so perhaps at first glance everything appears normal. "Nothing to see here," a casual observer might say...but let's take a slower and deeper look.

On the second round of bidding, East, in passout seat, balances with 2H. He does this red against white with J732, AJ107, 5, K954. His call is risky, but matchpoints is a game where you sometimes have to take a chance and possibly put your head on a chopping block, or else the opponents will rob you blind. Okay. But if he's GOING to balance, wouldn't it be better to double than to bid 2H? He has "only" four hearts...AND he also has four clubs, so he has equal length in both unbid suits. If he doubles, his partner will SURELY bid HEARTS if at all possible, so they won't miss HEARTS anyway if they have a fit...but if West has FEW hearts, he will bid clubs and they will find their BEST fit. It will be a level higher, true, but it will probably still be more successful than some poor NON-fit in hearts. On the actual hand, for example, had East balanced with a double, West would have bid 2H,so there was NO need for East to arbitrarily and UNILATERALLY bid 2H by himself. But don't EVER expect "partnership" from ANY piece of trash GIBBO robot!

An added reason for doubling rather than bidding 2H is that it gives West the option of passing for penalties if he has a suitable hand.

The definitions for East's 2H and South's 3D are both imperfect.

South buys the contract in 3D and West leads an obvious heart, right? Wrong, because these GIBBO imbeciles HATE to lead partner's suit, so the jerk BLINDLY leads his club 8 from Q108 tripleton. This actually works out WELL for the C.R.E.T.I.N., because it's a sad reality that C.R.E.T.I.N.S. often escape punishment and are sometimes even rewarded for their abject stupidity. That's the case here, as a defensive club winner is immediately established, whereas a more normal heart lead would have set up a second-round heart winner for declarer. EAST also lucks out: He stupidly plays his club KING at trick one instead of ducking. West had led the EIGHT, so either West had his ACTUAL holding of Q108 (meaning that it was unnecessary for East to WASTE his king, since the 8 would force declarer's ace anyway,...OR West's club 8 was from shortness, in which case it would STILL not benefit East to WASTE his king.

ALL that silliness would not be noticed unless you looked at the hand carefully.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/nemspzad

[benellis58]

Just one more example to illustrate the point from post # 1667 immediately above that MANY "subtle" errors by the GIBBO pieces of dirt go unnoticed if you don't look closely.

Ignoring West's questionable lead of the club queen, East's questionable play of the club ace, and East's questionable spade shift at trick two, let's just focus on the "subtle" error that will probably go largely unnoticed:

East's spades are Q1032. He wins his club ace and shifts to a spade - the THREE. Why the THREE? The GIBBO robots play FOURTH-best, so if East was going to shift to a spade, it SHOULD have been the TWO. Playing the 3 did not cost, and probably would NOT cost most of the time, so as errors go, it's certainly not a MAJOR one...but is still CLEARLY an error...and is a sign that these filthy dirtbags can't even get the LITTLE, EASY, OBVIOUS, NORMAL things right. The subtext is that these WORMS basically trea all spot cards as equals, fools that they are. GIBBO robots are pure garbage.

https://www.bridgeba...H9%7Cpc%7CC5%7C

[benellis58]

STUPID 2NT bid by the GIBBO robot in the North. Yes, he has a heart stopper, and yes, in such situations it is usually right to bid NT...but it is NOT right when you have FOUR of the suit and partner still MIGHT have four also, as was the case here. North should have bid 3H, alerting South to the fact that he (North) had four of them.

"Oh yeah," some GIBBO worshippers (poor souls!) might say, "but what about ALL the times when South doesn't have four hearts?"

Well, poor misguided, naive cult worshippers, South then simply bids 3NT himself, fairly confident that North's PROMISED four hearts will provide safety in NT for that suit.

https://www.bridgeba...HQ%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

An example of how hopeless, inefficient, wasteful, poorly thought out, downright stupid the GIBBO bidding system is:

Over North's 1NT rebid, South obviously wants to force to game. He has 15 HCP opposite a partner (North) who opened the bidding and subsequently showed a weak NT type of hand with 12-14 HCP.

The values are clearly there for game, but which game? South is 5-5 in the majors, so the best game could be in NT...OR spades...OR hearts. Sometimes there might even be a major suit SLAM if North has a suitable hand.

So, South wants to explore all possibilities as scientifically as possible, and he wants to involve his partner in the process, unlike the stinking GIBBO robots who much prefer to make some unscientific, unilateral decision all by themselves.

Fortunately, NS have lots of room to share information. Unfortunately, they play a system that stinks worse than ten-year-old dog food.

In a DECENT system, South would have several options. He could, for example, begin with 2D, which might, according to partnership agreements, be NMF, or might just be a general force, given that enemy East had earlier made an overcall of 1D.

GIB, however, STUPIDLY defines 2D as "5+ clubs, 4+ spades".

It defines THREE diamonds even MORE stupidly as "Bar bid" (meaning, "Please PASS, partner!"), stating that this "bar bid" shows "6+ diamonds, 4 spades, and 6-11 total points". TERRIFIC system...uhh...EXCEPT for the fact that EAST (!) earlier OVERCALLED one DIAMOND!

It gets even MORE comical, because the definition for FOUR diamonds...is the SAME (!) as the one for TWO diamonds (!): "5+ clubs, 4+ spades". Who, in the entire UNIVERSE, thinks that this is a good idea?

Okay, so their definitions of DIAMOND bids are outstandingly maniacal...but maybe their definitions of HEART bids are good. Let's see:

2H would be "4+ hearts, 5+ spades, 6-11 HCP". Gee, I have to admit that that actually makes sense (a SUPER-rarity for a GIB definition!). Sadly, though, it doesn't solve South's dilemma here, because he has a GAME-forcing hand and can't make a PASSABLE bid of 2H.

THREE hearts would be "5+ spades, 5+ hearts", Great! That's what South has! SADLY, though, the definition CONTINUES with "invitational". Aw shucks! South does not have an invitational hand - he has a game force!

That means that the ONLY way, in the DISGUSTINGLY bad and positively I.D.I.O.T.I.C. GIBBO bidding "system", for South to show his 5-5 in the majors AND force to game is to...BID the game. So he has no CHOICE but to bid 4H, which his partner will presumably either pass or convert to 4S. If 3NT was actually the best spot, hey not "lucky". If there happens to be a slam that you miss because you had to WASTE...THREE whole bidding levels and therefore could not have an intelligent, scientific exchange of information INVOLVING your partner, hey not "lucky". Npt "LUCKY", indeed, that you are SADDLED WITH such a HUGELY stupid, antiquated, unworkable piece of GARBAGE for a bidding system!

BUT...it's even worse (!) and even MORE comical than ALL that, because FOUR hearts is NOT defined as "5+ spades, 5+ hearts, choice of games", which would at least make some sense, but it is defined, in a typically PATHETIC GIB definition, as stupidly and WRETCHEDLY as you would expect. Wait for it...because the STUNNINGLY ignorant GIB definition of 4H by South over North's 1NT is: "6+ hearts; 4+ spades (!!!); 12+ HCP; 13-16 total points". Let's look closely at that fetid pile of bilge:

"12+ HCP" is typically, lazily, sloppily, far too VAGUELY defined with NO upper limit. Useless.

Don't even BOTHER with the junk about "total" points, because GIB doesn't EVER even have the slightest understanding of what "total" points are.

But in this pile of garbage, the SMELLIEST garbage is this: "6+ hearts, 4+ spades". First, WHY on EARTH does he have to have at least SIX hearts? Yes, he could have six, but...he is only PROMISING five! Second, "4+ spades"? FOUR (!) plus???!!! So, Mr. Braindead GIB, you are saying that he is PROMISING at LEAST six HEARTS...but could have as FEW as four SPADES? Then, pray tell, Mr. Braindead GIB, why the HELL would he initially have bid one SPADE (as he did!) if he had SIX OR MORE HEARTS and ONLY...FOUR (!) SPADES?

This ONE example...all by itself...is enough to prove that the GIBBO bidding system is nothing but NONSENSE that should LONG AGO have been destroyed. Just this ONE example! Never mind the many, many, MANY other examples of how totally atrocious the GIBBO system is. How was such a system even invented? Why would ANYONE have elected to play it? Please throw it out. Better late than never. It is and always has been an embarrassment.

https://www.bridgeba...H8%7Cmc%7C10%7C

[benellis58]

Another example of a hopeless GIBBO system. I spent a lot of time on the previous post, so I won't waste more here. I'll just link to the hand.

https://www.bridgeba...SA%7Cmc%7C12%7C

[benellis58]

Declarer play is undeniably the best part of the game for GIBBO robots. Even I admit that.

But just because it is the facet of bridge that the repulsive simpletons are "best" at, it does NOT mean that they are GOOD at it. It simply means that they are not AS wretched at it as they are at at EVERY other facet of the game.

Case in point: On this board, West declares 3NT. As you can see, he has nine TOP tricks. Presumably, he can NOT go down. Let's Watch this GENIUS in action, this genius whose apologists and defenders say is "better than most human players":

He withholds his spade ace at trick one and wins dummy's club ace at trick two. He then cashes 7 diamonds. He has taken 8 of the first 9 tricks. He only needs ONE of the last four tricks to make his contract.

His final four cards are the A6 of spades and the 92 of hearts. Golly gee, if I'm not mistaken that ACE (!) just MIGHT be his ninth trick. Does he cash it and enter a proud plus 400 in his scorecard?

HELL, no! HE'S a...GIBBO robot, so HE plays his heart 9 and his OPPONENT, South,...CLAIMS the final four tricks.

BRILLIANT "declarer play", Mr. GIBBO West, simply BRILLIANT, undoubtedly proving to your cultist apologists and defenders why you are "better than most human players".

https://www.bridgeba...ST%7Cpc%7CS9%7C